I am glad I did not illegally migrate to Canada...

On November 2, 2004 (one day before my birthday) President George Bush was re-elected President. And it was on that day, I seriously thought about packing my bags and moving to Canada. And I was not the only one planning a move. Numerous Americans were angered and outraged that a fraudulent leader, who had lied and deceived the American people, could win re-election. So, I thought about illegally migrating to Canada.

As a whole, Canada is viewed as cleaner country, more wholesome and spacious. With free medical care to all citizens (and free bicycles to all citizens in some provinces, believe it or not), Canada stands as a liberal and progressive beacon of light.

At the height of early 21st century, anti-Bush, American expatriate thought, American editorialists Andrew and Judith Kleinfeld wrote a brilliant article in the July 19, 2004 issue of the Wall Street Journal. Comparing Canadian culture to American culture, the Kleinfeld’s quoted Canadian sociologist Kaspar Naegele: "In Canada there seems to be greater acceptance of limitation, of hierarchical patterns. There seems to be less optimism, less faith in the future, less willingness to risk capital or reputation."
Canadians frown on rule-breakers, boat-rockers, and radical free-thinkers. Hmmm…. I’m glad I did not illegally migrate to Canada.
I am glad I did not illegally migrate to Canada because in America, I had the opportunity to cast a primary vote for Barack Obama. Like Michelle, I too am proud to be an American because it is a country where a black man, or any member of a marginalized minority group, can realistically aspire to be president. I mean, really, it is a country where a 72 year old, two time loser, can realistically aspire to be president. I am sure this would never happen in Canada.

I am glad I did not illegally migrate to Canada because in America we eat French fries covered in ketchup, while in Canada they eat French fries covered in brown gravy with cottage cheese sprinkled on top. It’s called poutine. Sounds appetizing? Um, thanks, but I’ll pass on the poutine.

I am glad I did not migrate to Canada, because that is the native land of Dave Coulier and Alanis Morriesette and they have always freaked me out a little. Uncle Joey was always a little too Pee-Wee Hermanish in my eyes (no offense intended, Mr. Reubens).

And what good is red and white without a little blue thrown in, anyway? Oh, and sometimes, its really cold there too. And when all else fails, I can still blame Canada.